no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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