I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
