I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Randomize
