Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
