Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
I'm really busy with my period
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