You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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