its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
