she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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