Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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