we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
i've created a new STD.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
