You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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