ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
