Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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