Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
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