Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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