My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
