We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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