i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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