You work out of a Hotel?
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
