On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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