Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
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