well most of my day revolves around power hour
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
