Pappa wants mamma naked
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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