Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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