And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
