Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I look excited, but its just a facade.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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