I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
