I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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