butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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