he looks like a really good dad on facebook
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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