I don't think brook has ever known best
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Randomize