i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
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