My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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