I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
