Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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