..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Randomize
