East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
you guys were way drunker than both of me
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
