we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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