It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Randomize
