5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
