You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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