I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
im about as happy as oj after his trial
apparently the secret to your success is patron
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
