haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
