No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
