I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Randomize