I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Let's paint friendship bongs
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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