I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
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