she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Randomize
