PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
