is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
